I've been reading through T-Shirt Hell's newsletters, which include samples of the hate mail the company receives. The topics are split approximately 20/80: either the writer makes some incoherent statement (possibly in support of the company – we'll never know, since in all probability the senders of those statements have drowned in one of their own bodily fluids*) or he (or she – women can be cretins too) proclaims T-Shirt Hell the sole/a perfect example of a corrupter of America/the world, the reason for the War on Terrorism/crappy economy/persecution of [insert minority here], and bearer of responsibility for the moral decay of society/perversion of our youth.
Normally I'd move on after feeling a pang of regret that I'm breathing air many of these people once breathed. These people, however, are particularly aggravating because so many of them write this letter:
( generalised by me )Hypocrites. I want to tear out their eyes and feed them their own livers. Now, I bring this up for three (major) reasons: these – let's call them people – people are
on the mailing list, meaning they're asking for it in as literal and clear a way as possible without stealing the shirts; the people invariably
liked the shirts making fun of other groups, but once they came across one directed at them, they suddenly couldn't comprehend (among other things) the makers' gall; and they are usually
using gratuitous profanity in their protests against intolerance/immorality – how very Christian of them.
Also, faggot has an 'o'. The only acceptable orthographic variation is 'fagot'. Yes, I advocate in all seriousness the censorship of those without at least a basic grasp of grammar and spelling (you don't even need a particularly extensive vocabulary).
End.
-Hedrick
*My vote is for cytosol.